Thursday, November 3, 2011

Something has got to give.

Tom's Journal.

Q.  I have always believed in Jesus as my savior since I was very young.  I have been baptized and confessed outwardly that I believe. Lately I have been thinking I am going to die and am not going to heaven, which scares and deeply saddens me!  I have continued to do things I shouldn’t. [...]

Good Day!  Windy and cold today with some rain...typical WI Autumn, and I went for some shopping, etc, in the morning.  I am having trouble sleeping at night for running out of certain VA meds., and they don't much care about us anyway... sorry.  If they could only hire more folks with a higher IQ...hummmm, and more doctors of higher caliber too.  Now they called me up to schedule a mirror imaging thing for my heart aorta in a few weeks!  What are they looking for?  Maybe they are trying to croak me to save money--and then I won't be able to tell the world the TRUTH about what's really going on behind the doors of the VA system.   
   I bought a new/ used $800 PC swivel chair for $150 today, from Bill Carpenter's store in Kenosha, WI., [] and he said he could also fix my old one that he sold me about 7 years ago!  
    I just wonder if I am suffering from "seasonal depression" already with less sunny days and gloom and doom.  I also feel abandoned, stranded, out of the loop, very alone lately, and don't exactly know what to do about it... besides going on-line to some 'Christian' dating sites.   "GOOD LUCK!!' Ha!  I think that most of them are just content with their own lives, but bored and looking for a thrill, or "players."  I think I am done buying prime ribs for women...  it gets me no where.  
  I been doing more praying, reading, and maybe I just need to kick back, but I'd like to form some sort of net work of friends near by.  
     Talk about the "drums of war" and 'sabre rattling' in the Middle East -- now they are playing with NUKES!  Something's got to give--pretty soon, but the world is oblivious to what will surely come-- and no one [hardly] knows the Bible, or cares.  And I feel that that OT prophet who was crying that the Israelite' s were surrounded by fierce enemies-- but God showed him that the enemies were surrounded by a heavenly army!! You gotta' have Faith.  And I always had/ have a fear that somehow I am going to 'drop the ball' in the last hour and be lost or damned... or just give up, or maybe I am not a godly sort of person... and that's a real nightmare for me!  I know some others with the same fears.  I have been roundly whipped, chastised, put in my place by so-called highly educated women  recently after budding relationships ended... or didn't progress as fast as I wanted, and I took that advice to heart.  But I can't help but 'feel' a real sense of URGENCY now, and every single day as I listen to the stinking news.  Can we even expect to lead any sort of normal life right now?  How God must look on us as a corrupt, immoral, greedy world or people rejecting His Word.  
     My old ways, before I knew the Lord, were to en-armor myself by learning, schooling, experience, special training,  to prevent any disaster coming down the pike, and net working with friends.  Seems like it still wasn't enough when 6000 people got laid off from Chrysler in 1989..Ha!  IF every thing comes together like I plan, I should be in super fine shape on Jan. 1st, but there is always MURPHY'S LAW, and the promises of God--His time table and prophecy.  The world simply cannot go on like it is now-- 'something has got to give!!!'  People in America [except combat Vets] just don't understand how bad things can get because of war, economy, poor planning by Liberal ding dongs in high places!  So I am not about to pat myself on the back or brag-- I am only human, make many mistakes, sin every day, and I am getting old and sore....  sorry, folks.  Right now, all I feel I really have to grip is my dog and my Bible.
    Can you imagine??  Winter is almost here now in many parts of the country.  
  My VA doctor just called me about a concern of his, and he wants me to drive down to North Chicago early to check me out in the ER.  Ha!  Nothing's too good for Old Soldier Tom.  He said they they are transferring him around like a billiard ball... lol.  I am touched by his concern for me.. really.

From my good friend, Jerry, Vietnam Vet.

Also check this out if you don't all ready have the listing, even though its by the feds its good.  Jerry

----- Forwarded Message -----
From: Veterans Health <>
Sent: Thursday, November 3, 2011 10:11 AM
Subject: Agent Orange Update

VA Seal and Newspaper

Veterans Health Administration Update
Agent Orange

Having trouble viewing this email? View it as a Web page.
November is National Diabetes Month
Diabetes mellitus type 2 is one of the diseases VA presumes is associated with exposure to herbicides, such as Agent Orange. Veterans who were exposed to Agent Orange do not have to prove a connection between their type 2 diabetes mellitus and military service to be eligible for VA benefits. Healthy eating habits and exercise can help prevent this chronic disease.
Visit the Agent Orange homepage to learn more about Agent Orange and VA benefits: