Tom's Journal.http://tomschuckmanjournal.blogspot.com/tschuckman@aol.com
My wife and I changed/ tweaked our plans and I took Sharon to the Kenosha [WI] Memorial Hospital, down by Lake Michigan about 0730 today, Sunday morning. By the time the docs and staff ran all their tests-- I got home about 1130 and church was letting out/ over, even as I was properly dressed.
Sorry to sound insensitive, but Sharon and I have been through this 'drill' many times and there is nothing much I can do waiting at the hospital, especially after they gave her meds to calm down and help her health challenges. She could not even stay awake to listen to me talk to her in the ER, so I dropped off her pre-arraigned over night luggage, and put my power scooter back into the Ram truck and came back home. I call her multiple times every day that she is gone.
The bad news is, with the EKG, blood tests, her heart has only about 30% pumping power, her lungs about 15%, they fear that her kidneys may be damaged or dysfunctional, along with diabetes, swelled legs and feet, Sarcoidosis, etc. That is all I can remember right now -- but it's kind of discouraging to me, personally. It always takes a day or so for the 'news' to sink into my head and then hits me hard latter.
I called and told the pastor at the church and another brother there. My Mom just wanted to talk BS about how her 2 'angels' [daughters] were both losing weight....Ha! Since she is an UN-believer, I felt that it was a wasted call.
It was NOT an 'inconvenience' to take my wife to the hospital again! It is just the "up and down" --yo-yo effect, and waiting for the "other shoe to fall." We know that Sharon is dying, afraid, upset, but I am having trouble dealing with it too, mere human that I am -- even though we know all the facts. She is a fighter. I have thought about this circumstance many times personally, and with the Holy Spirit/ Christian Faith, I believe that I would just like to expire, painlessly, quietly, if possible, or be martyred, and go to HEAVEN!! I figure with all my years of study, knowledge, prayers and sharing the Gospel, and being a farmer and a soldier -- I know what the dying process is all about, and this Satanic world is depressing enough, PLUS, I am tired and disabled. I would NEVER take my own life, nor will I help in mercy killing, but I honestly believe that a peaceful death has love and dignity. I know that I am re-hashing what I've shared in many past posts.
But caring for a loved one is a different story. With the doctor asking her questions this morning in ER as to what she wants in procedures in the ER room, she looked to me, but I said, 'it's YOUR body, and you ought to decide what options you want the learned doctor to do/ take.'
Actually, I hardly feel qualified-- and Sharon has a better medical back ground than I do. Right now, I am home alone with only the hound dog to talk to, and trying to digest the Popeye's chicken and rice, but my stomach is upset for some reason. I should clean the house but I just don't feel like doing anything today.... sorry.
I just want to take a stab at one thing... From the scriptures, we can know that: God Loves YOU [us]. John 3:16. Romans 5: 8.
All are Sinners: Romans 3: 23, Romans 3:10.
God has a remedy for Sin: Romans 6: 23, John 1:2
All may be Saved NOW! Romans 10:13, Revelation 3:20
IF a person honestly begs the Father in Heaven for help with all sincerity, trust, hope and faith, and accepts the Lord Jesus Christ as their personal Savior-- he/ she will be SAVED! I don't have time now to split hairs, argue, give an hour long sermon, define Greek and Hebrew words, etc., just to hold up the basics in a very simple way for all to see and read. I KNOW that I am SAVED-- even though I continue to sin every day of my life on earth-- but I can see improvements and more maturity, with the help of the Holy Spirit. But death should not be feared, hated, hidden, lied about, or morphed into some bad monster like the heathen and unbelievers want to do with it.
Death is nothing more than the 'GATEWAY' from this frail, fleeting, short life -- into eternity. If more people understood the Bible's practical wisdom of death, heaven and hell-- the world might be a better place. Even as we and I have sorrow now, just think if we didn't know the facts of life and death. Thank you all for your many prayers and kind wishes.
Tom Schuckman
tschuckman@aol.com
Jesus is Lord, Heaven is my Home.
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8 comments:
I will be praying for Sharon. We serve a great and mighty God. He may not take away our pain and suffering but He will never leave us. He has comforted and brought me through things that I didn't think I could live through... and I know He will do the same for you. I will keep you both in my prayers. God bless.
I am praying for both you and your wife. I pray that God's love, mercy, and grace will surround you both and be a very present help during this time of trouble.
Sending up prayers for Sharon's health and for you to hold up under the stress of it all. Helen
Tom, that was a beautifully said, honest from your heart post. Simple, plain TRUTH. Thank you so much for being such a good and faithful servant. Your heart is in the right place, and although some may see your words as hard now and then, one can't help but see how much you care about anyone who happens to read. Thank you for your friendship. I am keeping you both in my prayers, Sharon though especially, that she won't be afraid or in pain- that she will have, when she needs it, that both of you will have the immense peace that surpasses ALL our understanding. If it is soon time for her to go home (and I still pray though for her to get better) but if it is soon time, I pray for peace and that she will see the Lord face to face when He comes to bring her home- and that no matter how hard it would be for you to miss her, that you would see peace in your beautiful wife, and know that we all will see her again soon. God Bless you both SO Much Tom. I'm sorry, I hope you both are comforted. Please keep me updated.
From Wanda Jane in Hays, KS:
YOU need to take care of yourself too..
Prayers for healing---spiritual, mental, emotional and physical
God makes no mistakes and is always on time...
hugs,love and prayers
wanda jane
----- Original Message -----
From: Thomas G. Schuckman
To: alisahopewagner@yaho
Debbie, from Kenosha said:
Hang in there Tom. There are lots of prayers out there for Sharon and you. It is hard to care for a sick spouse; we just do what we can and let the good Lord and doctors take care of what we can't. Sharon has a "Living Will" doesn't she? They will follow that as Sharon wishes. God bless you both! I hope all things get better. Don't fret about the 30% heart function; many times my late husband's Ben's was even lower- and he bounced back. I know Sharon has a lot of other health issues- but I bet God is not done w/ her (or you) yet. Forge ahead; that's all us humans can do. You both are in our prayers.
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T
Mark Hoppe said,
Hi Tom:
Sorry to hear about your wife's condition. Add since we have never experience death before there has to be some fear involved even though we know where we are going it has to be fearful falling into the hands of the living God. However our fear will soon disappear as the loving Father will welcome them that are saved.
On another note the e-mail that you sent me about the eagles was forwarded to friends and pastors. I heard back from a person that it helped a pastor who was going through some spiritual battles. As he was out jogging he came across a tree full of crows making quite a ruckus and then he heard the scream of an eagle and seen it in the sky. The crows went silent. Then he remembered the e-mail and it was as though God was telling him that I am with you. It gave him peace about things that were going on in his life. I hope this helps you as I know that you could use words of encouragement. May the God of all creation bring glory and convert the lost in your troubles and show His love in the troubles you face.
(Col 3:2) Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.
Dale Birdsong said:
Hi Tom,
My prayers are with you and your wife. Be encouraged this day for God isn’t through with you yet.
You are a man that has a heart after God and even with all that you are going through, you love for the Lord and His word are evident.
Time is so precious and we can never get back what is lost. I can’t even imagine what you are going through, but I know my heart and prayers are with you. Even though it must be difficult, any time spent with your wife, even if it’s just to hold her hand or wipe the sweat from her brow is time well spent. I pray that you will continue to allow the Lord to give you the answers you need and even in the midst of heart despair, there is still joy. There is joy because both of you have a relationship with Christ. Nothing can ever take that away. Joy is your strength. Even In the midst of this sadness you have the joy of knowing the true meaning of love. You have the love of Christ. You have the joy of knowing that when God says it’s time to come home and only on His terms, there is a crown waiting. The work we do for the kingdom is never in vain. You and your wife have touched many folk’s lives over the years.
Nothing is impossible for God. He is the same God today that He was yesterday.
May God strengthen you where you are weak and comfort you where you are sad.
I stand in agreement with you according to God’s will and His plan for you and Sharon.
God bless you.
Dale Birdsong.
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